This post is going to be hard to write, not because she is hard to write about, but because there is so much love and admiration for this woman. This one is about my Mom, fitting as it is Mother's Day. This lady has been there for me every step of the way. She was my rock growing up. I was a tough child in the sense I always needed her to be around. I would have major meltdowns if she wanted to go out for a night. She didn't do it often, I was told my meltdowns worked. For me that is. :)
I am so grateful for her, both now and then. She has helped me through this cancer thing like no one else could have. After I told my husband the news, I told her. She held me that day as if I was a baby and told me things were going to be okay. I cannot tell you how many sleepless nights she has had because of me. I feel bad for that. But I am so thankful that she loves me that much. I know some people don't have great relationships, well even good for that matter, with their mom. I am lucky, because our relationship has just become stronger as I have gotten older.
My mom is also a cancer survivor, she had breast cancer when I was quite young. She is my hero. Knowing how I felt during my radiation treatments, and thinking she also had radiation blows my mind. My kids were older than I was when she was being treated. I think I was 3 and my sister was 4. Can you imagine that? Oh my, this woman has some sort of super hero strength about her. It is amazing.
So today on Mother's Day, I want to take a moment and thank my mom for being there for me. She was my personal cheerleader. I remember picking her up on our way to Milwaukee and she gets into the truck and first apologized that she had coffee and I didn't. (I was NPO and the day before was clear liquids only, so coffee and I did not get to bond.) Then she pulled out a scripture stating all things were going to be okay. I have that little note tucked away in my cancer box. For some odd reason her telling me that she was finally okay with what was going on made me calm. I hated her worrying for me. That was a terrifying road trip. That was the day my physical life changed for ever. I am so glad I had my mom there holding my hand and also being there for my Hubs, if he needed it. She wouldn't push him to talk, but if he felt like he wanted to talk, I am sure he knew she was there.
As most of you know, things are better. I am in remission and I keep moving forward on my progress. I may never be the same person again, and that's okay. Because, I know it sounds childish, I have my mom. A couple of weeks ago, I had a set back emotionally. I tried hiding it from her. Every time we talked I just said I was fine. Then one day I called her, I let it all out. She said two words that changed everything. I understand. That was all I needed, was someone understood. I didn't need comforting, I didn't need to hear things will be fine. Everything sucked at that moment and she said the right thing. She understood. Like a blink of an eye, I could handle all the stress again. Like I had posted that day, nothing has changed, I just could handle it once again.
Happy Mother's Day Mom, I love you so very much and am grateful for you!
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